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211 21.12.2011 22:16:35
A tiny but dignified old lady was among a group looking at an art exhibition in a newly opened gallery. Suddenly one contemporary painting caught her eye.
"What on earth," she inquired of the artist standing nearby, "is that?"
He smiled condescendingly. "That, my dear lady, is supposed to be a mother and her child."
"Well, then," snapped the little old lady, "why isn't it?"
212 21.12.2011 22:16:35
The first week they were married Mick gave his wife almost all his wages for that week, except for fifty pence, which he kept for himself.
The next pay-day his wife said to him "Mick, it must have been hard to manage on fifty pence for the week, I don't know how you did it."
"You will" he said grimly, "It's your turn to have fifty pence this week."
213 21.12.2011 22:16:35
A man walks up to a female colleague in his office each day. Making a point of standing very close to her, he draws a deep breath through his nose, pauses, smiles, and tells her how wonderful her hair smells.
After a week of this, she can't stand it any longer. The woman marches into her supervisor's office, tells him about the "hair thing," and that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man.
The supervisor is puzzled, and struggles to understand what the problem is. He asks her, "What is sexually threatening about a man telling you that your hair smells nice?"
"He's a DWARF!" the woman screams.
214 21.12.2011 22:16:35
A stewardess approached a gentleman who was voicing his complains rather loudly.
"Yes, Sir?" The stewardess said
"I want to complain about this airline. Every time I fly, I get the same seat, I can't see the in-flight movie, and there are no window blinds so I can't sleep."
The stewardess just sighed loudly and said "Captain, just shut up and land the damn plane."
207 21.12.2011 22:16:35
A guy came into a bar one day and said to the barman "Give me six double vodkas." The barman says "Wow! you must have had one hell of a day." "Yes, I've just found out my older brother is gay."

The next day the same guy came into the bar and asked for the same drinks. When the bartender asked what the problem was today the answer came back, "I've just found out that my younger brother is gay too!"

On the third day the guy came into the bar and ordered another six double vodkas. The bartender said "Jesus! Doesn't anybody in your family like women?" "Yeah, my wife..."
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